Wednesday is the big day. Cleaning out the beach house.
Sunday evening I relaxed after spending the afternoon letting my husband grab his favorite tools from my father’s garage before Hughes Estate Sales takes everything not now in storage. After consulting with my sister, decided to move and store very little – the rest we will sell or donate to charity. No sense spending a bunch of money on packing, moving and storage.

Decorated my parents’ room at Silverado Memory Care with my mom’s favorite paintings and charcoals by Leon Derbyshire, Seattle-based family friend. Today I learned that my father took them down, confused thinking that they were in a hotel and had to pack up to leave. He asked that I put everything down in writing for him because he keeps forgetting.
My husband has had fun wearing one of my dad’s big straw hats. He insists that he met me years ago in the mid-80’s as I studied on the beach, and that he was intimidated by my father wearing a big straw hat and sunglasses as he stood on their second floor deck keeping a watchful eye on his daughter and her would-be suitor. My dad scared him off back then, but welcomed him in our life when I was thirty-one.


Comments

31 responses to “Clearing Out”

  1. and, of course, dissociation.

  2. It will. Find someone specializing in sexual abuse recovery and PTSD.

  3. I definitely hope so, and thank you very much, I’m scared to death that it won’t

  4. Therapy definitely helps. Wish you the best.

  5. Indeed. My memories are not even close, but I am looking at therapy to fix myself and I know it is part of MY necessary mental health.

  6. Not all the memories are wonderful, but I was loved. That’s what matters.

  7. I really feel wistful-I am glad you have wonderful memories of your home life. I don’t feel like I have the right words to say

  8. (((Hugs))) As they say, aging (and loving those who are aging) isn’t for sissies.

  9. Yes, very hard. I cried when we brought my mom’s stuff to our house.

  10. Yes. It is difficult. I had to make decisions which I knew would be hard on my mother if she was involved in the process. Downsizing to assisted living is challenging. I got quotes on how much it would cost to move it all into storage. Way too expensive. Didn’t make sense to save furniture. Pared their possessions way down.

  11. You’re welcome.
    Hugs.

  12. Oh, I misunderstood. I thought your Dad had passed. My mother has Alzheimer’s and is in a nursing home. My husband and I had to go through all her things in her apartment and move most of it to our home before we moved her into the home. Such a difficult thing to do, never want to do that again.

  13. Be strong. We’ll be thinking about you and wishing you the best 🙂

  14. Yes. I did. Tough.

  15. Ditto but Dyane said it best!

  16. It’s so sad to witness the slow deterioration of somebody’s mind but writing it down will help. Did you see the movie “the notebook?”

  17. My parents haven’t died yet. They are in assisted care. My mom had a stroke and cannot speak. My dad has dementia.

  18. Felt a sense of accomplishment. Also met with potential tenant/buyer.

  19. Thank you, e. Love following you on Instagram. Not always able to keep up on my reading nowadays.

  20. Thanks! My father asked me to write a letter describing what’s going on since he keeps forgetting. Sent the letter today. Hope it helps them.

  21. Thank you. Productive. Wheeling and dealing with potential tenant and eventual buyer (former tenant next door – great family, great tenants).

  22. Keep fighting the good fight, Kitt.

  23. I’m very sorry for your loss, Kitt.

  24. I know how hard it is. At least you’re not doing it in the midst of grief but very hard anyhow!! Sending hugs, Ellen

  25. I’m not just passing through. I’m here intentionally…I wanted to hear your voice…Still reading..
    Hugs,
    e

  26. I could picture your daddy taking those pictures down. Sigh,
    Yes, you are so fortunate to have your husband and the story about the hat is priceless. 🙂

  27. That hat story when your husband met you is a great one – and I’m so glad your husband came into your life!!
    I know it’s going to be a huge challenge (understatement) but my thoughts will be with you today.
    I love you!

  28. Yes, it has been a lot of work.

  29. That sounds like a rough process, Kitt. I’m glad they can be together, though. Sending warm hugs ?

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