Divine Dissatisfaction
About the Author: Kitt O'Malley
Bipolar Writer & Mental Health Advocate
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Reblogged this on Marie Abanga's Blog and commented:
Oh my, how true I find this. That divine disatisfaction is to me like a virus – keeps prigging me to do stuffs and march on even when I feel overwhelmed and tired trying and doing 🙂
Oh Kitt! Really? Are you really in this place?
I disagree. There is a state of grace, of zen, we lowly humans have access to. Most of us just don’t get there often; it happens through a fluke or an epiphany, but we don’t work to integrate it in our lives. We make promises to ourselves we don’t follow through with, and then we wonder why we’ve lost that feeling. I’m not talking about going all meditation, yoga, and drinking green slime, either – though if that works for you, go for it. There’s a balance to be had, and if you’re feeling uneasy in your skin you’ve got to figure out why. I’ve spent the last 40 years figuring out ‘why’. And it’s still morphing, still changing. Each layer of hurt I uncover reveals another. I hate it, but I am resigned to it. I will rail against it, but I will continue. Only one thing has ever been clear to me: I’m here to learn. Sometimes I don’t understand the lesson, but there’s a lesson nonetheless. Look around, Kitt. If you’re really feeling this way, there’s a reason for it. <3
I believe it is possible to experience both this yearning and union. Yes, I do know I have purpose and that I’m a part of something greater. I experience the love, the union, a relationship with God (or whatever you want to call the experience), but I also experience a yearning for a deeper experience. So I am both driven and in grace intermittently and simultaneously.
Well said. 🙂
By the way, I consider myself to be a mystic and have attended seminary. I am not in crisis.
Glad to know that. I was worried you were in a bad space, so thanks for making it clear. 🙂
Thank you for your concern and for reaching out to me. I really appreciate it.
🙂 Anytime.
Reblogged this on signicience.
SO true! curious if you read “Proof of Heaven” by the neurosurgeon Dr. Eben Alexander.
He describes what sounds like a magnificent LSD trip during his week-long coma caused by a
rare, super-deadly bacterial meningitis.
I bring that up because he makes Heaven sound pretty damn good – no queer (secular) dissatisfaction whatsoever. It’s hard to imagine that. :0 But one thing he didn’t address was whether or not they have gelato there. He did see some happy dogs.
Got to add him to my mix of to read. It’s getting long…
I know! My to-read list is fairly long too, but it’s not diverse whatsoever in terms of topics – there’s way too much mental health and afterlife stuff. I was so excited after I bought a book about a mother, her adopted daughter and how “Anne of Green Gables” influenced them, but there’s too much of the author’s religion in it! 🙁 I also love reading memoirs and have been into reading about female British actresses and actors/comedians….Martin Clunes of Doc Martin fame, Dawn French, Liz Smith…. I miss a lot of the Brit references though.
You must read really quickly.
I read too quickly, need to slow down…absorb the information more. Although that’s hard to do with memoirs!
Reblogged this on REBEL WITH A CAUSE and commented:
it is the best of times, it is the worst of times