My dad has dementia – not Alzheimer’s, the most common type of dementia – but dementia nonetheless. His dementia has slowly progressed over many years and is greatly exacerbated by his heavy drinking. I am genetic heir to alcoholism, fear it, and drink minimally because of it.
Because I am feeling pain and anxiety over my father’s health, yesterday I spent an inordinate amount of time formatting and reformatting a cut and paste of content from the Alzheimer’s Association on how to cope over the holidays. Rather than write from my heart and deal with my angst, I spent hours tweaking HTML code until my post visually pleased me. In that small way, I exercised control, for I am not in control of my father’s brain health. I cannot make him stop drinking. I cannot stop his brain deteriorate, and it devastates me, for I love him dearly.
Yesterday’s post perhaps offered you both too much information and too little information. Too much information on coping over the holidays should you have a family member with dementia, for you could have simply clicked on the link to the Alzheimer’s Association article at the top of the post and received the very same content verbatim. Too little, for I did not speak at all. I was silent, hiding with my heart heavy, wondering what could be done to help my mother and father face this beast.