Grief, Compassion, and Love

Grief can be the garden of compassion. If you keep your heart open through everything, your pain can become your greatest ally in your life's search for love and wisdom. -Rumi

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Today my husband flew up to visit his brother who is at home receiving hospice care for advanced lung cancer which has aggressively metastasized. This post serves as a prayer for my husband, his brother, and the rest of their family. I’m at a loss for words.

This is also my second Writer’s Quote Wednesday 2015 post. Thank you Colleen Chesebro at SilverThreading.com for organizing Writer’s Quote Wednesday 2015.

Kitt O'Malley2015-02-25T14:28:27-08:00February 25th, 2015|Categories: Cancer, Compassion, Grief, Health, What About God?, Writing|Tags: Colleen Chesebro, hospice care, love, lung cancer, prayer, Rumi, wisdom, Writer’s Quote Wednesday|49 Comments

About the Author: Kitt O'Malley

Bipolar Writer & Mental Health Advocate

49 Comments

Do NOT Smoke! – Kitt O'Malley March 11, 2015 at 3:53 pm

[…] and pray that I am able to emotionally support my husband as he experiences grief, having lost his oldest brother last week to lung cancer. Grief, anxiety, and the fear of loss is what prompted me to begin […]
Writer’s Quote Wednesday Weekly Wrap-Up from 2/25/15 | Silver Threading March 2, 2015 at 10:14 pm

[…] Kitt O’Malley (second entry ) […]
Mindy Ogg March 1, 2015 at 2:09 pm

I understand. Well I hope it is quick and peaceful. You all are in my thoughts and prayers. xxx
Kitt O'Malley March 1, 2015 at 1:55 pm

I don’t think the family wants more people in the house.
Mindy Ogg March 1, 2015 at 12:52 pm

That’s all they did?? The Houston Hospice has volunteers and staff that goes in the home and takes care of the person and helps the family cope. I’m so sorry they are not doing that for your brother-in-law! Is there another hospice service in your area? This is what the Houston Hospice says on their site: http://bit.ly/1M1JlDe
Kitt O'Malley March 1, 2015 at 12:40 pm

Thank you, but he’s receiving hospice care at home. In fact, the hospice worker simply left a package at their door rather than bother the family.
Mindy Ogg March 1, 2015 at 8:22 am

Hi Kitt, I know just where you and your husband are coming from. My brother, Paul, had small cell lung cancer which metastasized to his liver and brain. In November of 2012 he entered into hospice. They gave him morphine which isn’t just used for pain, it also helps with breathing problems. I asked Paul if he was comfortable, and said he felt perfect. So please know that he is probably quite comfortable.

My mother also died in hospice on January 31, 2004 after 6 days and went peacefully. My brother, Paul, was only 57 and died on December 4, 2012 after having been in hospice for only 10 days. It’s already been over 2 years since he died. This will be over soon for y’all and so will the suffering. Then comes the grieving. Time will pass and you will heal.

Yes, hospice is very spiritual! The folks there were glowing, positive, and comforting as if they knew something the rest of us do not. It’s where folks go to transition, or whatever a person’s beliefs may be.

Kitt, I wish you and your husband lots of peace and comfort right now. And please be assured that, judging on my experiences with my mom and my brother, your brother-in-law is being well taken care of and is probably not suffering.

Wishing you the best. xxx
touchn2btouched February 26, 2015 at 1:42 pm

Reblogged this on touchn2btouched.
Kitt O'Malley February 26, 2015 at 10:05 am

Thank you for your prayer. So much.
Kitt O'Malley February 26, 2015 at 10:04 am

Yes, it is.
Kitt O'Malley February 26, 2015 at 10:04 am

Thank you.
Kitt O'Malley February 26, 2015 at 10:03 am

Thank you, Vic. Yes, we never know when it will end.
Kitt O'Malley February 26, 2015 at 10:03 am

Thank you so much for your prayer. Greatly appreciated.
Kitt O'Malley February 26, 2015 at 9:36 am

Thank you.
WiL February 26, 2015 at 8:03 am

I pray for peace and comfort for you and your family during this difficult time.
Bemused February 26, 2015 at 8:00 am

Oh that is so terribly heart breaking 🙁
Amy February 26, 2015 at 6:35 am

I love Rumi. Prayers to you all.
Just Plain Ol' Vic February 26, 2015 at 5:59 am

Sending best wishes to your husband and his brother (and you too Kitt). Life is short, live & love while you can!
writerwannabe763 February 26, 2015 at 5:42 am

Such a sad time for your husband and his brother and all family. May God see them though this, with His presence…. Prayer offered on their behalf… Diane
Sandy Sue February 26, 2015 at 1:18 am

Sending loving thoughts to all your family.
Kitt O'Malley February 25, 2015 at 10:23 pm

Thank you, Tanja. I am so sorry that you lost your father so recently to pancreatic cancer.
Kitt O'Malley February 25, 2015 at 10:22 pm

Thank you for your prayer and for the hugs.
Kitt O'Malley February 25, 2015 at 10:21 pm

Thank you, and yes it is tragic, for my brother-in-law is still in his 50s.
tamellu February 25, 2015 at 6:45 pm

I am really sorry for your brother in law, I do pray for his minimal suffering and for all your family. I lost my dad last September, it was pancreatic cancer what took him away, so I truly empathise with you and your husbands family. It’s very good that he has hospice care, there are no places like that over here, no oncological palliative care in Belgrade so me and my mom took the 24 hour care the best we knew and could – that’s horribly hard especially because he would have been much more at ease with IV meds and nutrition we couldn’t provide, and we would have had help. Hang in there, it takes tremendous strength to deal with such hard times. Hugs, Tanja
The Professionally Depressed Professional February 25, 2015 at 6:40 pm

I pray that you and your family find the strength in each other and in your faith to find solace in your sorrow. Big hugs Kitt.
Bemused February 25, 2015 at 5:59 pm

So sorry for what your family is going through. It is always so hard to deal with someones end of life 🙁
Sean Mungin February 25, 2015 at 5:14 pm

No need for thanks…that’s why I’m here 🙂
Kitt O'Malley February 25, 2015 at 5:07 pm

Thank you.
maggie0019 February 25, 2015 at 5:07 pm

I’m so sorry. Life is cruel sometimes, especially when loved ones suffer. Sending you, your husband, brother-in-law and family a soft tail wag and a very quiet Woof.
Kitt O'Malley February 25, 2015 at 5:07 pm

Thank you, Sean.
Kitt O'Malley February 25, 2015 at 5:07 pm

Thank you.
Kitt O'Malley February 25, 2015 at 5:06 pm

Thank you so much, John, for your prayer. I greatly appreciate it.
Kitt O'Malley February 25, 2015 at 5:05 pm

Thank you, Ellen.
Kitt O'Malley February 25, 2015 at 5:03 pm

Thank you very much.
Kitt O'Malley February 25, 2015 at 5:03 pm

Thank you, Colleen. Prayers are always welcome.
Kitt O'Malley February 25, 2015 at 5:01 pm

Thank you.
Kitt O'Malley February 25, 2015 at 5:00 pm

Thank you.
Kitt O'Malley February 25, 2015 at 5:00 pm

Thank you. Sending the same back to you.
Sean Mungin February 25, 2015 at 3:58 pm

You and your family will be in my prayers.
amommasview February 25, 2015 at 3:16 pm

My thoughts are with you all…
John W. Howell February 25, 2015 at 3:10 pm

I came to thank you for following my blog and want to offer a prayer for your brother -in -law
stockdalewolfe February 25, 2015 at 3:00 pm

Hugs, prayers and blessings to you all!! Hospice care is wonderful especially for a disease such as lung cancer. xx ellen
breakdownchick February 25, 2015 at 2:58 pm

I lost my mom to cancer. My thoughts & prayers are with you. <3
Silver Threading February 25, 2015 at 2:55 pm

Many prayers and hugs to you and your family Kitt. I have you all in my thoughts. 💖💖💖
Linda Oquendo February 25, 2015 at 2:53 pm

Sending lots of prayers and hugs to you and your family. Hospice definitely is a great service and organization. My mom worked with them for many years and many of my family members were cared for by them. Sorry to hear about your brother-in-law.
Kitt O'Malley February 25, 2015 at 2:47 pm

Thank you, Laura. Prayers welcome. Hospice is an important, difficult, and very spiritual time regardless of one’s beliefs.
susurrus February 25, 2015 at 2:43 pm

Just wanted to send my love to you, your husband, his brother and the whole family.
Julia Manuel February 25, 2015 at 2:42 pm

Me as well…sending you all love & light 💜
Laura Droege February 25, 2015 at 2:38 pm

I’m so sorry to hear about your brother-in-law, Kitt. Sending up prayers for all of you in the family during this difficult time.

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