How I've Been Grieving Lately
Before my father passed away, I planned to attend the Sunriver Writers’ Summit. Unfortunately, the summit followed only a month after his death, and I felt too raw to attend.
Social gatherings overwhelm and exhaust me and can trigger mood cycling, first hypomania as I get overstimulated and later a need to recover which looks like depression.
Now’s not the time. Now’s the time to spend with family. Visiting my mother and taking her out to lunch, which she enjoys. Seeing my sister, for we both deeply miss our father. So, instead of attending the writers’ summit, I visited Oregon with my husband and spent time with my sister and extended family.
We left our almost 18-year old son home alone, forcing him to forage a well-stocked refrigerator and freezer by himself. He managed to stay alive. Step in the right direction. (Got to encourage independent living skills before he goes out on his own.)
Thank you, Teri. God bless you.
Very gentle waves compared to the Pacific Ocean!
I must admit I am not good at coping will loss, particularly when someone I know loses someone close. I never know what to say. Sometimes I think that I need to have a better plan of what I will say. Being Christian, I think I should have a better grasp on it. Should I say,” he’s in a better place now,” or “I’ll pray for you.” I know everyone grieves differently and there is no “right answer.”
A couple thoughts that have helped me along my own journey:
~ Loss happens to every person. I will someday die and leave my children. I am blessed to have had so much time to spend with them. Any of us could die at any moment. We are not always given time to prepare or say goodbye, but It’s inevitable that we will all die. Making the best of our time here is the best we can do. Know it’s brief and appreciate every minute whether it be with loved ones or awaiting their return.
~ There is always something on this planet that is not perfect, which tells me there is a place that is perfect and it’s waiting for us in eternity. We are only here for a very short time, compared to all the time in the universe. There must be something God is holding on to for us that is perfect.
Find Peace, Show Love. Know you are not alone.
👍 Good wisdom in your choice to drop the Writer’s Summit, Kitt. Like your kayak paddling photo
for I can feel the waves.
I totally agree, Mihran. Family and some alone time. I allow myself to cry when alone.
Luckily, my med keep me stable. I seem to be grieving in a healthy manner so far.
I visit regularly. One of these times…
Thank you, Dyane. I’ve witnessed your daughters love for you in photos and videos. You’ve done well. They will be there for you, without a doubt.
It was gorgeous and healing. Nice to remember nature’s beauty.
Yes, it was.
Grateful for your caring support.
Hugs to you. You and your family need each other now, It’s awesome you were able to spend time with your mom, sister and husband. Sending you love.
Spending time with my family is such important relive and support in such difficult time. Stay strong and say a prayers every day. May God Bless you!!
Glad you spent the time you needed with close family it isn’t easy when losing a close family member like your dad you will get through it in time and will never forget everything you did together. Plus mental health is hard to deal with in the grieving process sending you a huge hug Kitt
Oh, how I wish I’d known you were coming to Oregon! I’d have loved to meet you somewhere. Anyway, I’m glad you’re taking some time to take care of you and be with family, from which you draw your strength. You are very self-aware and that helps immeasurably. God bless you.
I am glad that you are taking time off and visiting your mother.
Stay strong ❤️
I’m so glad you were able to visit Oregon and be with your sister. There will be other conferences in the future.
All the pictures you’ve shared of that area are gorgeous. At first glance, I thought you were at Lake Tahoe!!!) And as we know, nature is soothing, healing place – while the mountains and lakes can’t erase or lessen our grief that much, being in such magnificent surroundings is a balm for your soul.
It’s also great that you’ve been spending time with your mom. I hope my girls turn out like you, Kitt….
Lastly, I’m really proud of your son for handling being alone during such an intense, sad time to boot – after all, this was his blood relative, his grandfather. That’s so good for his confidence and independence..
Suttle Lake is one of our favorite places. A good place for healing… ❤️
Great job identifying what works for you. I hope it was a healing time.
Sending lots of love your way Kitt, for a very heartfelt journey. And a big hug as well <3
I’m so glad that you know your limits, Kitt, and have taken steps to make sure you stay healthy during this long, sad process.