Category: Bipolar Disorder
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From Age Thirty to Thirty-Seven
After I had my breakdown at age thirty, I moved back in with my parents. I found I wasn’t able to function on my own. I would fall asleep driving to my temporary job with Kaiser. When at the job, I couldn’t even read. The words were all jumbled. I appeared competent. No one could…
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I’m Back
My California Marriage and Family Therapist license is now current and renewed until May 31, 2016. Inactive license no more. Yes, that’s right, inactive no more. Coming out of a long, very long, two decade long, sabbatical. Wahoo! Here are my California Marriage and Family Therapist license stats: License Number: 29796 Current Date: 05/11/2014 10:01…
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Advocate or Narcissist
Thursday a new member of OC Writers, a MeetUp writing group I attend, referred to my work as “changing the world.” Of course, he hadn’t yet read my blog. As a Christian author, he assumed my writing was altruistic, since I described it as a mental health blog where I have also posted some seminary papers. The…
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Regrets
Regret Not Being a Good Enough Mother Feeling sick, difficult to sit with how I have parented my son. It’s been hard, but I have done my best. I feel sorry for him. He complains that I yell at him, that I am abusive, too loud. That he experiences me as abusive kills me, causes…
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Where Am I Going From Here?
Went to group therapy Tuesday, and attended my first Toastmasters meeting earlier that day. Toastmasters was very structured, probably too structured for my tastes, though worked well in that they covered a lot of ground in one hour. Mentioned in group that I completed my continuing education units to renew my Marriage and Family Therapist…
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Organizing My Thought Process
Tuesday in group therapy, my psychiatrist Alex Michelson (yes, he’s good, excellent actually, and practices in Mission Viejo, CA) pointed out that when sharing in group therapy I talked around my point until I finally getting to it. Unlike my writing which is usually terse and to the point, my speech (at least in therapy…
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Exhausted
Starting to recuperate from the last two weeks. Still exhausted. Sleepless nights, partly due to hypomania and stress, partly to dogs whining to go out in the wee hours of the morning. Too much 24/7 parenting. Home with my son almost two weeks, first when he had the stomach flu, second for spring break. Easter…
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Day Tripping
Often I get caught in my thoughts, in daydreaming and talking to myself, even gesturing and make facial expressions to match my train of thought. Keeps me from being in the present and drives my son nuts, especially when I do it driving him to and from school. My hope is to get those thoughts…
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LMFT
Back in 1990 I got an MA in psychology from New College of California. I worked hard over the next two years to rack up the then required 3,000 internship hours, and study for and pass both the written and oral exams to become what was then called a Marriage Family and Child Counselor. The…